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I received a compelling email from a senior in high school and I would love to get your help answering it.It’s such a sincere, honest email with such heartfelt questions about an important topic. Here’s the email (with her name changed and any identifying facts removed): Hi Gabrielle, My name is Lisa and I’m a senior in high school living in a medium-size city in Utah (I’ll be heading to BYU in the fall). I’m emailing you for advice among all people in the world because a) you’re a mom b) you’re LDS, and c) I like what you have to say especially about tricky topics like this. Today I was talking to my college age sister about a terrible law of chastity lesson I had in seminary and explained my frustration about how Mormons have such an unhealthy way about discussing sex.I’ve had sex thousands of times and I’m still learning stuff (there’s always some new trend or new term I’ve never heard of before).So keep asking questions, and don’t feel embarrassed about it.
But until you’re actually having sex on a regular basis, a lot of what you learn or hear won’t really be helpful or make sense.
I’m going to note: I’m not an expert or sex therapist and you know that.
You wrote to me as a mother, and I’m answering from a position of an LDS woman and mother who enjoys sex very much, and has a healthy sex life.
Thanks a lot, Lisa —- Dear Lisa, Thank you so much for your email. As you know from our exchanges, I’m going to respond publicly here, and I also want Design Mom Readers to respond, because I think this is a topic that benefits from many experiences and many points of view. Second, I don’t know you or your parents, but based on what you wrote, and your confidence, I think they seem pretty great.
I can see you have a ton of confidence just to write it up and send it. I also think you are not the only 18 year old that feels this way. So I’m hoping this public post can be a help to others who feel just like you. And I would 100% recommend that you share this same email with them — both your mother and father — and tell them you want to have a series of open, frank conversations about sex with them.