Age appropriate behavior teens dating
After all, they made the conscious decision to step over the line.
Grounding them for a week can actually be a time where you can build your relationship; you can use the time to do things together.
Yes, they need to obey the rules and remain inside the boundaries you have set, but I want to encourage you to put their behavior into the context of their lives and not label them as a rebel just because they are acting like a teenager.
Parents need to recognize the difference between a distracted or foolish child and one who is making a bold “You can’t tell me what to do! Though both may seem rebellious, only the latter is trying to be.
Or, has something happened in your child’s life, even unbeknownst to you, that is affecting them? She said, “I’m struggling with my daughter who has suddenly become rebellious. And by definition, they are still a bit irresponsible.
For instance, she was to meet me after the third quarter of the basketball game, but she didn’t show up until after the fourth quarter and had gone to her locker, which I told her was off limits for the evening.” The mother was quite dismayed, wondering if she should get her daughter into counseling or send her to a therapeutic program like Heartlight for her “rebellion.” My response was, “I really don’t think she is being rebellious. She is impulsive and maybe gets a little distracted, but it doesn’t seem as though it was an intentional plan on her part to make you upset or go against your rules.” I went on to give her some ideas for helping remind her teen of the rules and established timetables. Part of the new “normal” today is the shorter attention spans of young people.
Could it be that you are still treating them like a child and need to give them a few more freedoms?Express value to them and sorrow that they have to suffer the consequences, even as they are in the midst of experiencing it. I’d like to treat you that way, but if you insist on being treated like you’re 12, I will!But you won’t like it because you’ll only have the privileges of a 12 year old.” To that end, perhaps the biggest tool in a parent’s arsenal of consequences today is taking away a cell phone.It’s normal for teenagers to fail to do their chores without 10 reminders, to put off their homework, to be emotional, to lose important things, to like music that is too loud, and to sometimes counter or question authority. A young man we worked with described his own experience from normal to abnormal behavior this way.That’s all pretty typical, though it can be aggravating to parents. He said, “I felt like the things I was doing were pretty normal—schoolwork was boring.